its kind of hard seeing that im shy and that when people want to talk to me its like i throw them off .... im afaid that if i get to caught up in the momment that ill lose the person that i am ... which is a loser ...Shy girl needs advice 2?
Are you feeling like a loser because you are shy? Well, what is your definition of loser? Mine is someone who has nothing, no personality, no smiles, no no no.....
You are not one of them because you are shy...it's a good thing if used the right way. My husband is shy, he uses it to his advantage. If he wants someone to think he's not listening, he is but you'd never know it. He will say hello, but then lower his head just long enough to let the person start to walk off and then speak to him, catches them off guard every time. He has more fun waiting to see what people will do when he doesn't respond to them.
Shy is okay as long as you use it to your advantage. Try a few of his techniques and see if you don't feel better soon.
He even tries to be a mean looking person once in a while....yeah, like that works....only to those he wants to catch off guard.
But everyone, and I mean everyone, likes him once they get him to come out of his shell. And I bet you are the same way. He married me, the one who likes and talks with everyone, so he doesn't have to, until I make him and I catch him off guard!!You're doing fine, just work the shyness to your advantage, okay/\Shy girl needs advice 2?
Your not a loser, I use to be the same way, I would never talk to anyone and keep to myself in school sometimes but after a while I got tired of no one ever talking to me so I walked up to them and talked to them instead of waiting for them to come to me. I'm still shy at times but not like before
just stay true to yourself and be yourself the only person you should want to impress is yourself
never put yourself down, and say youre a loser. put it this way..either everyones a loser, and were all cool..or everyones cool, and were all losers. that makes no sense..but its true =]. and when your talking to people, just relax, think about if you were them, would you want someone to throw you off? probably not.
your not a loser
Don't be afraid to be yourself. Don't let yourself put up that shield, and let people get to know you, even if you are afraid. They will like you more for being you, and not being fake. It's okay to be afraid.
Hi.
Don't think more of your attribute. Just think I'm girl but could do anything as strong better than others. Thats all Have fun and raise your current sweet life.
Regards
Chrys.
Either I have misunderstood or you are a very perceptive person.
You say you are afraid that if you talk to people you will get ';caught up in the moment'; and then lose your sense of yourself that you are a loser. Now most people would not understand why that would be bad...they would affirm that you should lose your sense of being a loser.
But what I get from your question is that what you feel, when you lose yourself in conversation is, ';phoney';. Now, we are all losers-Ok? Most of life is spent in trying to hide from the ';emptyness'; (subconsciously) we all feel- hence loveless sex,consumerism, shopping, Tv, gadgets etc etc etc...
But until we know our ';emptyness'; or that we are empty, then how can we ever try and deal with it, or work towards filling ourselves with something more real? To know that you are a ';loser'; is already a very great thing.
Now about feeling a ';phoney'; when in conversation- look, since it is all basically phoney all you are really doing is observing yourself rather more acutely that everyone else, again a good thing- you have self awareness to a greater extent than the average.
When you observe others and their phoniness try and feel ';compassion';- after all they cannot help it, they are unconscious concerning themselves. And when you feel your phoniness also FEEL COMPASSION for yourself...the fact that you can observe your phoniness means that there is a part of you that is looking for something more real, is more Real.
Try googling ';Know thy self'; ';consciousness'; ';fourthway';..
Of course i could be completely wrong...being that I am such a loser...
if ya a loser maybe u shud lose the person u r and start afresh. if ya shy u probs got no self confidence eitha. strt a physical sport like kick boxin or sutin like da, tht way u get any anger out and u meet new ppl. another option is dancin or sutin to do with performing... i aint th most confident person but i been dancin sinse i wer two an i promise.. bein on stage and performin in front of loads of people is really encouraging, especially when they applaud when you finish.
if ya dnt wna do them then jus get close friends and talk to them... you will eventually get the confidence to spk 2 new ppl
you must talk to a professional psychologist may something in you past happened which is making to find it difficult to let people in your life
